Welcome aboard Pseudopolis Station! Yes, it’s old and the living areas technically are cleaned out kudzu farms but hey, lots of shopping opportunities while you’re waiting for your ship to be refueled.

Inspired by sitcoms of yore, Standard Docking Procedure follows a ragtag crew of walking disasters as they deal with their day-to-day workplace emergencies. From serial sandwich thieves to forgetting your keys while locked outside. You know, the usual problems… in space!

Behind the scenes Standard Docking Procedure is purpose-built to be an audio fiction series that blends the wacky fun of workplace sitcoms with the wonder of a sci-fi world. Everything isn’t always canned peaches and powdered cream on Pseudopolis, but the show comes with an official promise not to bum listeners out.

The world is a rough place, and it’s usually even rougher in fiction. How many wonderful sci-fi series have you stopped to think about and realize actually living in that world would be incredibly sad/dangerous? Those properties are amazing, we all love them dearly, but when the real world is taxing enough we feel there’s a need for something a bit more light-hearted. With a diverse cast and some elbow grease we aim to make one heck of a fun show.

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Listen Now!

full episodes

The master list of full-length Standard Docking Procedure episodes.

episode 1: Space Steaks (pt. 1)

In the inaugural visit to Pseudopolis station we find station traffic controll clerk Tiff’s work day is not going as planned. Instead of the usual boring routine of helping ships dock and undock she’s got to figure out how to sell 40 tons of synthetic meat on a station full of people who don’t y’know, need 40 tons of synthetic meat.

Content Warning: This episode contains audio of a character taking a bite of a crunchy piece of food. No chewing or other mouth-sounds are heard.

Transcript

Episode 2: Space Steaks (pt. 2)

We rejoin our heroes mere moments (and totally not five months) after the end of part one. Will Humphrey and Tiff come up with a plan to thwart the dastardly, some would even say rude Captain Widdershins and offload 39.9 tons of pre-cooked synth-steak?

Content Warning: This episode features a scene in which a character drinks a non-alcoholic cocktail in a bar.

Transcript

Episode 3: Space Date

Reagan’s breaking back into the dating scene, but in doing so accidentally set up two dates at the same time! What’s a space-girl to do?

CONTENT WARNINGS: This episode includes depictions of a sci-fi battleground with gun sounds, explosions, and one “on screen” character being shot in a PG-13 manner.

Transcript

MINISODES

Five-ish minute skits set aboard Pseudopolis! Produced between episodes specials and during fundraising campaigns.

Humphrey’s Picture day

We join Humphrey waiting in line to get a new ID photo taken now that he’s a resident of Pseudopolis station. He’s never had a good ID photo before, and intends on changing that today. Tiff is also there, she’s got chili fries and nothing better to do.

Transcript

Eat at carloni’s

For the second of our four mini-sodes we find Reagan joining Carloni in a recording booth ready to record what’s sure to be the viral ad of the century for Carloni’s 3D Pizza.

If only Carloni was also ready.

transcript

tiff breaks the intranet

On this mini-adventure we hear the story of how Tiff’s yearning for having food delivered instead of going to get it herself managed to crash the entire station’s intranet. It involves trivia and a very frustrated April.

transcript Coming Soon

dr. humphrey, Obgyn

You’re in an elevator with a pregnant person, they go into labor… what do you do? Or, even better question, what does HUMPHREY do? Well, buckle up and find out as this minisode pits Humphrey against the impending doom of the miracle of birth.

transcript

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